Deep Thoughts with Joshua...

I'M RICH BITCH!!!

Not that I have a ton of money, or a fancy car, or mad fly jewelry, or anything that can be measured in dollars and sense. What I do have is the best son, sweetest son ever. A ton of great friends, family, and the best girlfriend ever.

Money never has and I suspect never will make my happy. I am rich in the people in my life, and I know they are true because of all the shit that has gone down over the last year they are all still here. I had no idea I had so many friends, so many people that legit want to see my happy, and so many that actually care.

When you are rich in love and friends it is easy to smile, it is easy to be happy, and it is easy to do the right things in life. Life is all about balance, and when you can take the time and enjoy the riches of your life it makes that balance easier to come by.

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Deep thoughts with Joshua....

At the end of the day I am still a guy, and I get caught up in girl logic traps just like every other guy, but in my 36 years of life I have learned a few things and this may be one of the most important things I have learned.

If you are with a girl and you cannot, effortlessly mind you, make her feels happier than happy and have all her friends be jealous of her you are not with the right girl. Everything in life boils down to little things and if you cannot do the little things without expecting anything in return IE doing some small thing just to get her to smile you are with the wrong girl.

I am not talking about Valentines Day, or Sweetest day or any of those other corporate holidays invented to get guys into trouble. I am talking about random little acts of kindness and love done for the sole reward of making your lady smile. If it feels like work to you you are with the wrong chick. If it is a struggle to find little things that she will appreciate more than you can fathom that you are with the wrong chick, or course the opposite is more than true. If those things come easily then you are with the right lady.

In the end the lesson here is this, it is not that you have too, it that you get too.

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Deep thoughts with Joshua....

This is one of those things I have to constantly remind myself about. I am a jumper, i like to jump right in to any given situation but especially when it comes to girls. I'm a jumper and I constantly fail to learn the lesson that life is a journey not a destination.

In the end I am just a junkie and when I find something I like, or something that makes me smile I go after it with reckless abandon. In my lie it has led to many a poor choice, and it is something that I constantly need to remind myself to do. To slow down, breathe and let nature take its course.

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Deep thoughts with Joshua....

Life is weird. Given the conveniences of modern technology I am having two very different conversations with two different people in two different states. But the theme of both conversations is fairy tales. The first conversation was one about Sansa Stark, from the popular TV show and book series, Game of Thrones. Sansa's biggest flaw is she looks at life through Rose Colored Glasses. She has spent much of her 14 years of life reading romantic stories and is trying to make the events in her life fit into those ideals.

At the same time I am talking to someone else about believing in fairy tales and how often that ends up in heart break, but it would be such a shame to give up the belief in them, or the search for that ultimate fairy tale.

We can all be jaded by the events in our lives. It would be easy to be cynical. It takes a certain amount of courage to chase a fairy tale, and it takes a lot of alcohol to recover form when that fairy tale goes wrong, but it takes unbelievable courage to pick yourself up and start chasing the next fairy tale.

Without those fairy tale ideals, life would really be a drab affair...so no matter the level of the heartache, or heart break pick yourself up dust yourself off, and chase the next fairy tale...if you dare!

Deep Thoughts with Joshua...

A lot of people lately have been asking me what my type is...Like what kinda of girls I look for or are attracted too. To be perfectly honest I don't think I have a type. I'm not just attracted to red heads or blondes or whatever. I have dated tall chicks, shorts chicks. I guess in the end for me, and this sounds horribly cliche, a lot of my attraction boils down to personality.

I think there are have been four great loves in my 37 years of life. And if you lined up those four women side by side you wold see the big differences in appearance, and maybe even in attitude and disposition. I'm not gonna lie I do like to date "difficult" women. Maybe that is my type and maybe that is why my love life is a freaking wasteland of despair.

They often say variety is the spice of life and I once subscribed to that theory but as the mental image of Trisha, Christy, Kathy, and Lea floats through my mind I see that I was attracted to different kinds of things and different points in my life.

I guess the point here is to trust you gut, it knows what you want way more than your heart or brain do.

Deep thoughts with Joshua.....

The best advice I can give, and the advice I need to follow myself a lot of the time is to sit back and enjoy the journey. You cannot force anything to happen, and even if you can you will ruin the specialness of it all. As hard as it is you have to step back and let stuff unfold as it is suppose to. I don't mean take no action but instead of forcing things just take a deep breath, let it out, and what is meant to be will be. This is advice I gave someone today, and it is advice I need to keep in mind.

Deep thoughts with Joshua....

I want to be the reason she has a smile on her face. I want to be the thought in her head. I want to be the reason she questions why she dated anyone else. I want to be the reason her heart is no longer broken I want to be her everything, and yes I want to be the reason she is so......

Deep thoughts with Joshua...

if you find someone who makes you smile...never let that go..never stop working for it...never get lazy...and even after years together treat her like you did when you were still trying to convince her to be yours...Everyday you have to reprove yourself to her